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Canadian Bobsey Twin Sled Team
in advance of the 2014 Olympic games in Russia, Canada's own Bobsey Twin Sled team give some advice to Vladimir Putin on how to "do it". (performed in the Queer Russian Cabaret, VideoFag, Toronto, 2014)

Perfect Girlfriend
meet my perfect girlfriend: she always answers her phone and she's never crabby. her name is Emily and she works for Bell Canada. (performed on the Storyteller's Stage, Pride Toronto, 2008)

Freak Show
step right up for a glimpse of the strangest Freaks you'll ever see!! this one reads The National Post!! this one used to work at McDonalds!! (performed at Buddies in Bad Times' Strange Sisters Cabaret, 2003)

Three Favourite Coats
beginning with an economy-leather biker jacket that's 100% vinyl to a lime green Jackie Onassis rip-off, an exhibitionist display of three favourite coats. (performed at the Foto/Fashion/Fetish Cabaret for A Space Gallery; at the Ms Leather Toronto Competition, 2001)

Lesbian Pairs Figure Screwing Competition
Bill Bob and Bill Bulucon work for CLITV and bring you live coverage of the International Lesbian Pairs Figure Screwing Competition. (performed at Buddies in Bad Times' Strange Sisters Cabaret,  1997)

One Queer Mom, One Well-Adjusted Daughter
the critics are right: queers do make bad parents. but against all odds the kids are turning out fine. (performed on the South Stage, Pride Toronto, 2007; at Pages Bookstore This is Not a Reading event for the launch of Who's Your Daddy?, 2009)

What Brown Can Do For You 
Yoni Brown delivers packages to the lesbian community. it's a thankless job with strict codes of performance. (performed at New York's Frigid Festival, 2010 and Buddies in Bad Times' Strange Sisters Cabaret, 2002)

Dr. Constance Cumming's Bathhouse Lecture 
Toronto has just experienced its first women-only bathhouse and Dr. Constance is here to clarify bathhouse behaviour. (performed at Buddies in Bad Times' Strange Sisters Cabaret, 1998)

 Donald Jeffrey
Donald Jeffrey is confused about his name and his gender. maybe he was supposed to be a girl? (performed at Dirty Babette's Cabaret, 1997)


"We at Uniformed Pleasure Supply have been suppliers of quality packages to women since 1970, when pleasure was first discovered by them, after some 50 years of noticing that voting is not all it's cracked up to be."
-What Brown Can Do For You